Don Kowalewski
Writer. Ad Sales and Marketing. Social Media Content Creator. Aeropress Coffee. Makes the best salsa in the world.
Things I Love: Soccer and Coaching Soccer
I’m a lucky guy. I raised my hand three years ago and said, “I’ll coach soccer,” and nobody told me to stay seated and be quiet, so three years later, I’m still coaching. This past Sunday marked the end of my third fall session of soccer and I’ve watched my third grade girls, my daughter among them, go from 6-year-olds who picked flowers and grass during games, to skilled and hard-working soccer players. In fact, at Sunday’s game, I heard them talking to each other asking for the pass, and two times in the game someone made a backwards pass in order to set-up something that resembled an attack.
We tied 1-1 on Sunday. We tied a team that I’ve never beaten in 2 1/2 years (yes, I made a mental note). We tied, and we had enough scoring opportunities, we should’ve won. We finished the season 5-2-1. We play in a rec league, so it’s theoretically “non competitive” and we don’t really keep score, we don’t have standings, and it’s just for fun …but, ahem, I kinda keep track. Oh, and before you get all “that’s the problem with our society – everyone gets a trophy” on me, there are PLENTY of competitive leagues all over Detroit. This league is fun. It allows a kid who maybe just moved to the area, or didn’t decide he or she wanted to play soccer until 3rd or 4th grade …it allows them to play and have fun. That’s a good thing. Life and sports get ultra competitive soon enough …it’s great to have rec leagues, still.
Anyway, soap box aside, and if I can get out my tissue box …coaching my daughter and her friends is a highlight of my life. Yes, it’s a major time commitment (a practice during the week, and games on Sundays …not to mention I also coach my son’s 1st Grade team). Yes, at times it feels like I’m missing something and it feels like everyone is looking at me and thinking, “Don doesn’t know what the heck he’s doing, does he?” But I know, many years from now, I’ll have nothing but fond memories of every minute of it – the good and bad.
I know this because it’s already happened. I can’t guarantee it’ll happen again, but I hope I’m making an impact – even if only a small impact. See, about 15 years ago when I was fresh out of college, my wife got a job teaching 2nd grade. I had an easy job and lots of time on my hands, so in order to network, meet people, and make friends, I volunteered to help coach 2nd grade soccer. Aside from being a 23-year-old running around helping the 40-something fathers, I had about 20 years worth of soccer experience to throw at these kids. But I tried to make it fun, show the kids proper footwork and technique, teach them some nuances of the game, but mostly …have fun. Sports and soccer can be serious, but there’s a time and place for that. I’m of the opinion, if kids have fun doing something, they’ll be more likely to want to do more of it. And soccer is a perfect example of that …in foreign countries, soccer is a religion. But it starts as something fun.
Anyway, way back then in the late 90s, though I didn’t actually know what I was doing, I tried and helped coach that team for 2 seasons. Then my career got more busy, I got a new job that didn’t let me skate out at 3pm, and I had to quit coaching.
That chapter was closed … until about 12 years later when a former player used the power of Facebook to reach out to my wife and write a note about how much fun he remembered having at soccer and having me as a coach. I can’t remember every detail of the note, but I think this kid was all grown up and about to graduate and become a teacher and he singled out his two seasons on my team as having a great impact on his life.
I know …nice note to write to a former teacher …“hey, thanks for teaching me to read and do math, but your husband doing pratfalls and slapstick at soccer practice and showing us the Brazilian Butt-trap …that was life-changing.” Maybe teachers should do more physical humor during class. Just a suggestion.
Long story short …oh, wait …long story longer, being a coach is great. I’m not a “cool” 23-year-old dude anymore, but I hope I might still be having a small impact. I often look across the field at my daughter and her friends and wonder what lies ahead for all of them in their future. I don’t assume they’ll all stick with soccer, but whatever they do, sports or otherwise, they’ll do great things. They’ll grow up and get onto travel teams, other sports, or into other activities. They’ll likely all head off to different high-schools and do amazing things and I’ll read about them in the local paper, on The Patch, or in newsletters or church bulletins. I’ll run into their parents and hear amazing stories about what they’re up to, and I’ll smile big and bright because I’ll remember how they were “way back when” and I knew they were destined for great things.
Some scoff at the idea that it’s not whether you win or lose …but it’s true. Life is not about wins and losses. It really isn’t. It’s about playing the game. And if you play the game, you’re bound to experience the thrill of victory, and more than likely you’ll taste the bitterness of defeat. Hey, that’s sports. Heck …it’s life. Good and bad. Ups and downs. Highs and lows. Sometimes you have more of one and less of the other, but it’s all part of the journey and the game. No matter how good you are at soccer, there’s someone better. No matter how fast you are, there’s someone faster. No matter how bad you lose, it could’ve been worse. No matter how bad you played during the game, someone could’ve played worse.
But I can guarantee this …nobody could’ve possibly had more fun than I did. Nobody could be more proud than I am. And nobody had a better September and October than I did. Nobody loves coaching more than I do. Nobody got to see and hear bigger belly laughs than I heard at soccer practices. Nobody heard more uproarious laughter from my daughter and her friends in the backseat of my car as we carpooled to and from practices, or as they all started calling me “Coach Mohawk” and then laughed uncontrollably while I pretended to be mad. Nobody. And if we had finished the season 0-8, I’d still be smiling. And if 8-0 meant less fun and laughter, I’d say “pass.”
So I’ll say it again …it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose. But …
… I won.
Things I Hate: Carving Pumpkins
I love the Internet 99% of the time, but I hate what it has done to Halloween pumpkin carving. With the invention of Google Images, now everybody thinks they need to be the Michelangelo (he was a sculptor, right?) of pumpkin carving. I blame Google Images and the internet because, prior to their intrusion on our lives, most people were perfectly happy to carve a pumpkin with a smiley or a scary face. Nothing more. In fact, a little less than a decade ago, I would sometimes carve a Spartan “S” or the word “B-O-O” into a pumpkin and people would trick-or-treat at my house and marvel at my work.
Now, such word play barely registers. Everyone nowadays seems to create elaborate landscapes and characters on their pumpkins with multiple levels of brightness and shading. It’s amazing. And what makes me most upset is I can’t do it.
I don’t have the patience. It takes too long. When I’m trying to carve out blades of grass or Harry Potter’s glasses, I shove pumpkin pieces right through and what was supposed to be a “scar and glasses” (if you are a Harry Potter fan, you know) becomes a giant hole in Harry’s forehead. I also found a pattern online to carve Disney’s Ariel (The Little Mermaid, see top-left) onto a pumpkin and it looks sort of like Ariel, but sort of like a cro-magnon woman (truthfully, it was a little closer to Neanderthal-woman because of its larger jaw). I guess I could say it was my pumpkin tribute to evolution, or something.
I’m mad because it makes me feel inferior. And soon, as my children start to get a little older, they’ll think of me as inferior in regards to pumpkin carving. In the old days a Dad could simply refuse to do dumb stuff like carve pumpkins and that father would be revered as “tough” and “workman-like.” Childish and silly things were not “his thing.” But modern fathers aren’t allowed to be aloof, distant, and they cannot adopt a “pumpkin carving is not becoming of a man my age” attitude. Oh, and don’t even get me started on how society frowns on allowing your 5, 7, and 8 year old to use your sharp kitchen knives to carve pumpkins.
No, modern fathering means you must be “into” all things. And I am – except pumpkin carving.
Last night (speaking of letting children use sharp kitchen knives) my oldest daughter carved a pumpkin all by herself. Every single detail, hole, and gutting was the work of her hands, and her hands alone. Halfway through her pumpkin, she said, “Dad, I’m going to put a classic pumpkin face on this thing …you know, just a smile with silly teeth and triangle eyes,” and I nearly hugged her (except my hands were covered with pumpkin guts …it’s not because I’m a Dad “not into hugging”). So simple. Sooooo right. Without knowing it, she flipped the whole dynamic. I’m not carving eloborate city-scapes and multi-toned images onto my pumpkin because I can’t, I’m not doing it because it’s passe … it’s sooooooooo 2009. I’m carving classico Americana pumpkin imagery because it’s tradition. It’s what the Tea Party and Republicans think pumpkins should be …a face, and nothing more. No need for modern carving kits or a Rotozip.
Ah, the mind of a child. Now, I can just be a Dad who isn’t “into all that new-fangled pumpkin carving” and my kids can still have fun carving pumpkins with me and we’ll use my three tried-and-true classic patterns (shown below). And I’ll make pumpkin seeds and eat their candy.
Happy Halloween.
Things I Think: Random Things
I know the musical group Florence + The Machine is popular, but I don’t get it. This is the latest group I don’t understand. They’ve been added to a list with Radiohead. Everyone loves them, and yet I can’t force myself to enjoy listening to them. When I listen to their CDs, my mind wanders and I don’t hear anything. This must be what it was like to be pushing 40 when rock n’ roll music was invented – it just doesn’t make sense.
If Herman Cain becomes the Rebuplican Presidential nominee, and you still have a McCain/Palin bumper sticker on your car, you can cleverly cover up some letters and have a ready-made “Cain” bumper sticker. And Herman Cain would be smart to pick a running mate with some combination of the letters p-a-l-i-n and then sell a McCain/Palin bumper-sticker-upgrade kit. Oh, wait …I’m going to create the McCain bumper sticker upgrade kit.
Winter! It’ll be here soon. I’ve always been a big believer in winter, and I have oft proclaimed that I’d never live in a place without snow, without drastic seasons, and without the rejuvenating qualities that come with below zero temps and massive amounts of road salt. But I’m pushing 40, and these past two winters seemed to last forever and I might be changing my tune. I’m thinking more and more like Utah might be cool. It’s sorta west, it’s mostly moderate, and if I want snow, I can drive a few hours and enjoy really expensive and scenic snow …versus the blackish-grey stuff that snow becomes after a few days of being plowed, salted, driven on, and polluted.
Beavis & Butthead is back. It won’t be funny, right? But hey …good for Mike Judge. If MTV will pay him, more power to him.
Anyone out there thinking about their Christmas list? Ya know, before you know it, your local radio station will be playing Christmas music 24/7 and your kids will demand that you put that station on, the stores have already started putting out Christmas decorations, and you’ll be stuck making your list based on what advertisers say you should want. It’s true …men might have all sorts of great ideas in September or October, but some November and December and if you ask them what they want, they’ll all say “a tool set and a ShopVac.” That darn media. On my previous blogs, I was always very public with my Christmas wish-lists, but on my new blog …it’s going to be even bigger and better! I’m going to have begging/pleading videos, I’m going to take pictures of myself in stores enjoying the store display so that my gift-givers will see how happy they would make me with said gift. I’m saying …check back often …the Christmas wish-list goes public on November 1st.
Speaking of Christmas, I’m starting to see and hear people refer to fellow Justin Beiber fans as “true Beliebers” and its all stemming from his new song, “Mistletoe” and these people Tweet and post things like “Merry Christmas to the Beliebers.” OK …so now I’m completely on board with the concept of a war on Christmas. This must be stopped.
That’s all I have for this Wednesday. Don’t forget to subscribe to this blog, to bookmark the Donnie Jalapeno blog, and speaking of Donnie Jalapeno, get your weekend salsa orders in. Today!
Things I Love: Cool Apps
I have an iPad. Not an iPad2 …just the plain ol’ original. And I LOVE it. I think it’s about the coolest electronic gadget I’ve ever had in my life.
I know, I’m not alone and I ain’t sayin’ anything millions of geeks haven’t already said.
I’m really excited today about The Weather Channel’s new app. If it’s anywhere near as cool as it looks in this video, I’m going to be checking and doing all sorts of weather related things today. In fact, if this app is as cool as it looks, I’m thinking this is really going to jump start iPad sales among senior citizens …they LOVE obsessing about weather.
I’m pushing 40, so it’s about time I start taking my weather condition obsession more seriously.
My Friday is suddenly looking partly awesome with a 5 to 10mph geek blowing in from the west, and a 50% chance of time-wasting this evening.
Things I Love: My Daughters
Earlier this week I was sent a link about 50 things a father could do to make his daughters great people. It was 50 pieces of advice designed to ensure a man’s daughters are confident, strong, and prepared for life in this scary world.
Read it here:
And I thought, “oh, these are great ideas. I do some of these things and I’ll start doing some of the other things.”
And then I thought, “wait a minute! How are these the only 50 things? And where’s the fine print, here? Does this dude have some psych degree and is he willing to pay for a tattoo removal should any of these techniques fail?”
I feel like I’m a pretty good Dad. I give myself a B+ on most days. I try and take the wisdom from my Dad and watch how he raised his daughter (aka my sister), mix it with whatever my father-in-law did to create my awesome wife, and then I go over my notes from watching my uncles raise my girl cousins, and I think I’m on the right track. But I certainly don’t feel like I could write a definitive advice column on raising a great daughter who will then grow into a perfect teen, 20something, and grown-up woman/Mom/wife.
I know what yer saying …geez, Don. You certainly are over thinking this and pooping on a really nice blog entry by someone. Trust me …no poop was used in the writing of this blog.
The problem I have with lists like this is how they make me feel like I’m desperately behind the curve when I see 5, 6, or a dozen things I’ve never done with my daughters. Plus, such lists always say “tell your daughters they are beautiful.” But I read a book once that said DON’T tell your daughters they are beautiful, and instead tell ’em they’re smart. Because then we heap societies judgements on them and they will grow up thinking, ‘I must be beautiful’ when we want them to think ‘I am smart.’ So, that’s why I greet my daughters each morning with a hearty, “Good morning my beautiful, smart, confident, humble, prayerful, realistic, fun, nice, pretty, intelligent, forgiving, awesome, great, creative, angel!” It’s a mouthful, but I don’t want to pigeon hole her.
Or maybe I’m heaping too much on her.
Point is, I think lists are great, but if you read Tim Russert’s book “Wisdom of Our Fathers”, you’ll notice that every daughter and son in the book speaks glowingly of their own father. Some fathers were like friends, some fathers were distant and cold, and others were somewhere in the middle. I’ve determined it’s pretty hard to screw up being a father. But when you screw up, the damage can be catastrophic.
On the list linked above, here’s what I’m not doing. I’m not buying her Converse All-Stars (aka Chuck Taylors) because I think those shoes are ugly. I’ll never take her camping and I’ll tell her why camping is horrible. I’m already 8 letters behind on the “write her a letter every year on her birthday and give them to her someday”, and sorry …no puppy. So I guess I’m a bad father. But I do let her make me coffee (not like a helper monkey …she loves it). She is my official salsa taste tester. She fights with her mother and I always take my daughter’s side. I’m the bad guy at bedtimes on school nights. I cuddle with them at bedtime. I make my two daughters share a room and when they complain about wishing they could have their own rooms, I tell them they can …and it’ll happen 15 years from now when they graduate college and they get a job and don’t move back in with me. Then again …making them share a room NOW will prepare them for having roommates in college, after college, and then for marriage. Compromise, sharing, fighting, and making up are all part of it.
And finally, at this stage, with an 8 and 5 year old, I’m just hoping the moves I’m making now will pay dividends 10 years from now. I’m sure just about every father who’s had to deal with double pierced ears, tattoos, too much make-up, lies, sneaking out of the house, and being told “I hate you Dad and I wish I had never been born” …I bet at least a few of those Dads took their girls fishing and taught them to change a tire.
Here’s hoping I’m doing things right.
p.s. this video has nothing to do with this post. Just a song stuck in my head by Allison Krauss & Union Station.
Things I Think: I’m a Jinx, I Have a Lucky Hat, and I Have an Unlucky Hat
I’m at a real crossroads in my life. My son just turned seven and I love that he loves the things I love. He has a very kind heart and he wants to make me proud. I know, most sons are probably the exact same way, but it’s heartwarming beyond words when it’s your own son.
This is such a complicated thing …see …my son, 7, still believes that wins and losses by sports teams are the results of the efforts of the players on the field. For example, the Tigers playing down in Texas in the ALCS. My son loves sitting next to me and enjoys the drama of sport. He doesn’t understand that, in fact, the players have very little to do with the outcome of the game and it’s actually we fans, specifically me, who must wear the proper “lucky hat” while sitting in my “lucky chair”. And if my “not watching” the Tigers means they’ll win, then I can’t watch.
Dumb kid.
This Tiger season it’s been proven time and time again. I haven’t seen a single good thing the Tigers have done. I missed Verlander’s no-hitter. I almost missed his second no-hitter, which he took into the 8th inning, and then I put the game on TV and immediately, he allowed a hit. I didn’t watch a single game during their 12-game win streak. I watched the thirteenth game – they lost. I attended two Tigers games. Both were losses. Oh, and last year I turned on Galarraga’s “perfect game” in the 8th inning and one inning later, an umpire made a horrific call and there was no perfect game. So now it appears the only way the Tigers are getting to the World Series is if I don’t watch.
Still don’t believe me? Try this on for “crazy.” Last Thursday night was Game 5 v. the Yankees. It was my bowling night. The bowling alley is full of TVs and everyone was watching and cheering. Me? I was doodling on some paper and constantly checking Facebook and I dared not lay eyes on any of the TVs. I even forced my teammates to not give me updates, but instead ask me hypothetical questions that secretly revealed what was happening in the game. And the Tigers won.
I won.
Many fathers look forward to explaining baseball to their sons. They look forward to teaching them what a “double play” is, and explaining what RBI, ERA, and RISP mean. But I have the added responsibility of explaining the importance of a lucky shirt, the rally cap, and why I hold my breath during pop flies, why I hold a bat in my left hand when runners are on base, and why I never hang a flag supporting my sports teams on the front of my house – I’m 0-13 when a flag is flying on my house. I have a hat I wear when the Spartans are playing defense. I have a hat I switch to when they play offense. They went 11-2 last season …you can’t argue with logic and fact. The alternating hats work.
Some will think all this superstition is absurd. Some won’t.
I have a confession …
Last night, the Tigers and Rangers went into extra innings and my wife and son were watching the game on the big screen in HD and cheering and groaning along with all the magical sports moments while I, instead, pretended to make myself busy in the kitchen doing something silly, but really only trying to avoid the game, the stress, and jinxing them. But then something happened that made me feel like the Grinch when he heard the Who’s singing down in Whoville …my son came up and asked, “Dad, why won’t you come watch the game? It’s a really good game and I want to watch it with you.”
And the Who’s down in Superstition-ville say, that Don’s paranoid heart broke in three places that day.
So, seeing his face and thinking about how ridiculous most people think I might be, I said, “yes …let’s go watch.” And I walked with him, hand in hand, and plunked down on the couch knowing full well I was bringing doom to the Tigers, but I wouldn’t trade it for the smile I brought to my sons face.
Let the record show, less than 15 minutes later, Tiger reliever Brad Penny loaded the bases with three straight runners and then some dude hit a walk-off Grand Slam (and I got to explain to my son what a “grand slam” is), but my son wasn’t hardly bothered in the slightest. He said, “well, there’s three games back in Detroit, right? It’s OK.”
Again …dumb kid, but he has a point.
With apologies to all the Tiger fans I know, to Leyland and his spunky cats, and to all Tigers fans everywhere … I’m going to watch the games …with my son. I’m going to enjoy the moments and pop popcorn and I’m going to buy him a Tigers hat – lucky or otherwise.
Even if secretly I’ll be trying to figure out which spot on the couch is lucky and if there’s a lucky snack I should be eating, I’m done with superstition, or so my Magic 8 Ball said.
“Most Likely.”
Thanks for reading.
Things I Do: I Bowl
It’s Thursday …the most wonderful day of the week. It’s the night I exercise my American manhood and I go bowling – granted, it’s a co-ed league, but still.
Tonight, I’ll have finally established my new average, and I’m not ashamed to admit I sand-bagged a little. Perhaps at the detriment of the team (we’re off to a 7-28 start), but I think now that I’ll be bowling over average, we’re gonna make a run.
We also welcome back our Fulcrum Bowler (aka Bowler #3, aka Steve). Tonight’s bowling’s highlights will include, but are not limited to:
- Eating warm lettuce
- Watching Game 5 of the Tigers-Yankees ALDS through the silhouette of a hob-goblin (though someone told me the game was moved to Friday, but that’s possibly only because they don’t want me to watch because I’m a Tigers jinx)
- Watching Bowler #4 bowl with a sturdy back. This time of year, no issues for Bowler #4. In about 3 months, it gets painful to witness all of the stretching, arching, aching, and pure torture he goes through to get through another season.
- Meeting the “New Guy”. I am certain things will be very awkward for the first 4 frames, but by the 5th, we will all be whistling, drawing pictures, and spinning quarters.
- Knowing that even though Joe & Barb are not slotted to bowl tonight, they will show up, for the whistling, drawing, and quarter spinning.
- Not knowing what place we are in – hopeful that we are in first, frightful that no recaps have been posted, which could mean another year of cellar dwellers.
- Talking with Paul about the benefits of polishing the ole bowling ball, removing the old oils with Windex, and never actually doing any sort of maintenance, but pretending that it will happen.
- Bowling the first 200 game of the season, and celebrating with the ceremonial run to the other side of the alley, and high fiving the “men” until you get sucker punched in the gut
Things I Love: September Birthdays
If you’d have told me 10 years ago that I’d have two kids both born in the month of September, I very likely would’ve punched you square in the face and un-Friended you on Facebook (if Facebook had existed). I’m serious. But here I am, ten years later, and I’ve had to change my whole world view because that’s exactly what happened …two of my kids were born in September.
I have never been a fan of September born people, but I love my two little Septemberians (I’m assuming that’s what you call folks born in September). And the good news about having two of your children with birthdays so close together, you get to throw a combined party and get all that gathering of family out of the way in one shot.
One of the traditional songs my family sings at birthday parties is “Happy Birthday” and while of I have fond memories of my mother and my aunts taking the high notes while Uncles sang bass, and grandma beat-boxed (we would’ve dominated as a family a capella act on The Sing-Off, btw …recaps of my favorite show at spunkybean), it’s entirely possible we sounded more like we do in the videos below.
I know at least one person who hopes the new “screaming” v. “singing” doesn’t catch on. And I’m sure the “screaming” was a one-time thing, right? Cuz I know kids …they hate screaming and laughing.
Hard to believe my youngest is 5. Enjoy this little-known birthday song and let me know if you need to know where to send gifts.
Things I Do: Ghost Write
Is ghost-writing 1-word or two? Either way, in addition to the blogging I do, I also ghost-write. I ghost-write for two celebrity/gurus and just this week, I penciled a deal (which hopefully will be re-written in ink, soon) to author a memoir for a pretty awesome guy who works in my industry.
Turns out this is not uncommon. There are many successful men and women who are really great at being successful at what they do, and all of them would like to write a book they can brag about, but despite all their success, writing is totally intimidating.
Or, some of them just plain can’t do it.
I can. Meaning, I can write.
I was halfway through a sales book with a friend (and I kinda dropped the ball), but now I’ve got a real deal with a real timeline and the subject of the book could make for a really interesting project.
Have you ever read Tuesdays with Morrie? Me neither, but lots of people did. As I understand it, Mitch Album had a favorite professor from his college days and years later, Mitch, then a successful newspaper columnist, got back in touch with his old professor and wrote a book about him. And that book was a mega success and inspirational.
It is my hope this book can be something like that.
I have a stack of speeches, essays, newspaper and magazine articles, letters, stories, and quotes that I’m supposed to turn into a book. Fun.
Just promise me you’ll buy a copy when I finish. OK? OK.
Things I Do: Coach Soccer
The fall season is underway and my 3rd Grade girls team is 1-1 while my 1st Grade boys team is 0-2 (including a 9-0 drubbing this past weekend). Score shouldn’t matter. It’s a recreational youth league. Right? The primary goal is for all the kids to have some fun, run around and get some exercise, and if along the way some kid falls in love with soccer and becomes a soccer star, so be it. Truly …that’s the goal. It’s my goal. Team are comprised of any kid who wants to play. Any kid, at any age and of any skill level can sign up and play, and I’m glad there’s a rec league that caters to that.
My goal, in fact, is that my kids enjoy practice as much, if not more, than games.
However …it’s human nature. We all keep score. It was true for my Kindergartener’s tee-ball in the summer, and it’s the same for soccer. When a team loses, and especially 9-0, it doesn’t go unnoticed …by anyone. Luckily, I’ve never seen 6-year-olds play soccer like the team we played this past Saturday, and even the opposing coach shrugged his shoulders after the game when I complimented his team and a few of his players and he said, “I know …I’ve never seen anything like it …these boys could beat my 4th Grade daughter’s team.” You should’ve seen these 6-year-olds. Passing …spacing …relentless attacking and they had moves. This one kid did a spin move and a step-over!!!
I’m mostly concerned with trying to teach my boys which direction to run, and this kid’s doing step-over spin moves.
Needless to say, this is still going to be a super fun season for my 1st graders.
My third grade girls won Sunday, and I’m really glad for them. Once again, this is a rec league so score and wins/losses aren’t the main focus, and that’s never my focus …but I have a group of girls that work so hard, it’s nice to see their efforts rewarded. Also, as the guy who raised his hand and said, “I can coach. Soccer is my sport. I played it my whole life. I love soccer. Soccer is da bomb” …as the guy who said that (I may or may not have said “soccer is da bomb”) it’s also nice to see them have success and get a win because it validates my coaching …just a touch …and rewards their hard work (we practiced for an hour in the pouring rain last Wednesday and not a single girl complained).
Turns out, and the season will tell me if this is true or not, that I never taught the girls to score. When I played soccer, I played defense. I have a knack for bothering people, so it was a perfect spot for me. And, I lacked that little part of the brain that makes great scorers. I think some of it is instinctive. There are just some people who, when they hear the word “go”, they charge like a bull …screaming and yelling and throwing caution to the wind. These people are the goal scorers. Then there are people who, when they hear the word “go”, start a little slower. They want to think things through. And I think these people make great defenders. On defense, there’s quite a bit of observation that takes place. Analysis of the opposition. Defenders react to situations and learn what all the situations look like. Defenders thrive on some structure and systems. Forwards embrace the mayhem. Forwards and goal scorers only need to know one thing …”What is the end result I want? Ball inside that net? OK. ROOOOOOAAAAAR!” And off they go, with reckless abandon, and those goal scorers are of the mindset, hey, they’ll just adjust on the fly and eventually it will all work out.
What I’m saying is …I’m over analyzing this (defender). What I’m also saying is, I now have a theory that I’ll use to teach the girls scoring and show them how to get into better scoring positions and hopefully I’ll identify those goal-scorer types that thrive on chaos, and teach them how to best manage chaos and, hence, score goals.
And then I’ll write a best-seller business and sales book based on these theories.
This was all a long way of saying that I love soccer, I love coaching soccer, and the season has “kicked off.” Ha! Puns. Love them.
Thanks for reading and if you need me, I’ll be revolutionizing the soccer world.
Don Kowalewski 