Don Kowalewski
Writer. Ad Sales and Marketing. Social Media Content Creator. Aeropress Coffee. Makes the best salsa in the world.
Things I Love: Cool Apps
I have an iPad. Not an iPad2 …just the plain ol’ original. And I LOVE it. I think it’s about the coolest electronic gadget I’ve ever had in my life.
I know, I’m not alone and I ain’t sayin’ anything millions of geeks haven’t already said.
I’m really excited today about The Weather Channel’s new app. If it’s anywhere near as cool as it looks in this video, I’m going to be checking and doing all sorts of weather related things today. In fact, if this app is as cool as it looks, I’m thinking this is really going to jump start iPad sales among senior citizens …they LOVE obsessing about weather.
I’m pushing 40, so it’s about time I start taking my weather condition obsession more seriously.
My Friday is suddenly looking partly awesome with a 5 to 10mph geek blowing in from the west, and a 50% chance of time-wasting this evening.
Things I Love: My Daughters
Earlier this week I was sent a link about 50 things a father could do to make his daughters great people. It was 50 pieces of advice designed to ensure a man’s daughters are confident, strong, and prepared for life in this scary world.
Read it here:
And I thought, “oh, these are great ideas. I do some of these things and I’ll start doing some of the other things.”
And then I thought, “wait a minute! How are these the only 50 things? And where’s the fine print, here? Does this dude have some psych degree and is he willing to pay for a tattoo removal should any of these techniques fail?”
I feel like I’m a pretty good Dad. I give myself a B+ on most days. I try and take the wisdom from my Dad and watch how he raised his daughter (aka my sister), mix it with whatever my father-in-law did to create my awesome wife, and then I go over my notes from watching my uncles raise my girl cousins, and I think I’m on the right track. But I certainly don’t feel like I could write a definitive advice column on raising a great daughter who will then grow into a perfect teen, 20something, and grown-up woman/Mom/wife.
I know what yer saying …geez, Don. You certainly are over thinking this and pooping on a really nice blog entry by someone. Trust me …no poop was used in the writing of this blog.
The problem I have with lists like this is how they make me feel like I’m desperately behind the curve when I see 5, 6, or a dozen things I’ve never done with my daughters. Plus, such lists always say “tell your daughters they are beautiful.” But I read a book once that said DON’T tell your daughters they are beautiful, and instead tell ’em they’re smart. Because then we heap societies judgements on them and they will grow up thinking, ‘I must be beautiful’ when we want them to think ‘I am smart.’ So, that’s why I greet my daughters each morning with a hearty, “Good morning my beautiful, smart, confident, humble, prayerful, realistic, fun, nice, pretty, intelligent, forgiving, awesome, great, creative, angel!” It’s a mouthful, but I don’t want to pigeon hole her.
Or maybe I’m heaping too much on her.
Point is, I think lists are great, but if you read Tim Russert’s book “Wisdom of Our Fathers”, you’ll notice that every daughter and son in the book speaks glowingly of their own father. Some fathers were like friends, some fathers were distant and cold, and others were somewhere in the middle. I’ve determined it’s pretty hard to screw up being a father. But when you screw up, the damage can be catastrophic.
On the list linked above, here’s what I’m not doing. I’m not buying her Converse All-Stars (aka Chuck Taylors) because I think those shoes are ugly. I’ll never take her camping and I’ll tell her why camping is horrible. I’m already 8 letters behind on the “write her a letter every year on her birthday and give them to her someday”, and sorry …no puppy. So I guess I’m a bad father. But I do let her make me coffee (not like a helper monkey …she loves it). She is my official salsa taste tester. She fights with her mother and I always take my daughter’s side. I’m the bad guy at bedtimes on school nights. I cuddle with them at bedtime. I make my two daughters share a room and when they complain about wishing they could have their own rooms, I tell them they can …and it’ll happen 15 years from now when they graduate college and they get a job and don’t move back in with me. Then again …making them share a room NOW will prepare them for having roommates in college, after college, and then for marriage. Compromise, sharing, fighting, and making up are all part of it.
And finally, at this stage, with an 8 and 5 year old, I’m just hoping the moves I’m making now will pay dividends 10 years from now. I’m sure just about every father who’s had to deal with double pierced ears, tattoos, too much make-up, lies, sneaking out of the house, and being told “I hate you Dad and I wish I had never been born” …I bet at least a few of those Dads took their girls fishing and taught them to change a tire.
Here’s hoping I’m doing things right.
p.s. this video has nothing to do with this post. Just a song stuck in my head by Allison Krauss & Union Station.
Things I Think: I’m a Jinx, I Have a Lucky Hat, and I Have an Unlucky Hat
I’m at a real crossroads in my life. My son just turned seven and I love that he loves the things I love. He has a very kind heart and he wants to make me proud. I know, most sons are probably the exact same way, but it’s heartwarming beyond words when it’s your own son.
This is such a complicated thing …see …my son, 7, still believes that wins and losses by sports teams are the results of the efforts of the players on the field. For example, the Tigers playing down in Texas in the ALCS. My son loves sitting next to me and enjoys the drama of sport. He doesn’t understand that, in fact, the players have very little to do with the outcome of the game and it’s actually we fans, specifically me, who must wear the proper “lucky hat” while sitting in my “lucky chair”. And if my “not watching” the Tigers means they’ll win, then I can’t watch.
Dumb kid.
This Tiger season it’s been proven time and time again. I haven’t seen a single good thing the Tigers have done. I missed Verlander’s no-hitter. I almost missed his second no-hitter, which he took into the 8th inning, and then I put the game on TV and immediately, he allowed a hit. I didn’t watch a single game during their 12-game win streak. I watched the thirteenth game – they lost. I attended two Tigers games. Both were losses. Oh, and last year I turned on Galarraga’s “perfect game” in the 8th inning and one inning later, an umpire made a horrific call and there was no perfect game. So now it appears the only way the Tigers are getting to the World Series is if I don’t watch.
Still don’t believe me? Try this on for “crazy.” Last Thursday night was Game 5 v. the Yankees. It was my bowling night. The bowling alley is full of TVs and everyone was watching and cheering. Me? I was doodling on some paper and constantly checking Facebook and I dared not lay eyes on any of the TVs. I even forced my teammates to not give me updates, but instead ask me hypothetical questions that secretly revealed what was happening in the game. And the Tigers won.
I won.
Many fathers look forward to explaining baseball to their sons. They look forward to teaching them what a “double play” is, and explaining what RBI, ERA, and RISP mean. But I have the added responsibility of explaining the importance of a lucky shirt, the rally cap, and why I hold my breath during pop flies, why I hold a bat in my left hand when runners are on base, and why I never hang a flag supporting my sports teams on the front of my house – I’m 0-13 when a flag is flying on my house. I have a hat I wear when the Spartans are playing defense. I have a hat I switch to when they play offense. They went 11-2 last season …you can’t argue with logic and fact. The alternating hats work.
Some will think all this superstition is absurd. Some won’t.
I have a confession …
Last night, the Tigers and Rangers went into extra innings and my wife and son were watching the game on the big screen in HD and cheering and groaning along with all the magical sports moments while I, instead, pretended to make myself busy in the kitchen doing something silly, but really only trying to avoid the game, the stress, and jinxing them. But then something happened that made me feel like the Grinch when he heard the Who’s singing down in Whoville …my son came up and asked, “Dad, why won’t you come watch the game? It’s a really good game and I want to watch it with you.”
And the Who’s down in Superstition-ville say, that Don’s paranoid heart broke in three places that day.
So, seeing his face and thinking about how ridiculous most people think I might be, I said, “yes …let’s go watch.” And I walked with him, hand in hand, and plunked down on the couch knowing full well I was bringing doom to the Tigers, but I wouldn’t trade it for the smile I brought to my sons face.
Let the record show, less than 15 minutes later, Tiger reliever Brad Penny loaded the bases with three straight runners and then some dude hit a walk-off Grand Slam (and I got to explain to my son what a “grand slam” is), but my son wasn’t hardly bothered in the slightest. He said, “well, there’s three games back in Detroit, right? It’s OK.”
Again …dumb kid, but he has a point.
With apologies to all the Tiger fans I know, to Leyland and his spunky cats, and to all Tigers fans everywhere … I’m going to watch the games …with my son. I’m going to enjoy the moments and pop popcorn and I’m going to buy him a Tigers hat – lucky or otherwise.
Even if secretly I’ll be trying to figure out which spot on the couch is lucky and if there’s a lucky snack I should be eating, I’m done with superstition, or so my Magic 8 Ball said.
“Most Likely.”
Thanks for reading.
Things I Do: I Bowl
It’s Thursday …the most wonderful day of the week. It’s the night I exercise my American manhood and I go bowling – granted, it’s a co-ed league, but still.
Tonight, I’ll have finally established my new average, and I’m not ashamed to admit I sand-bagged a little. Perhaps at the detriment of the team (we’re off to a 7-28 start), but I think now that I’ll be bowling over average, we’re gonna make a run.
We also welcome back our Fulcrum Bowler (aka Bowler #3, aka Steve). Tonight’s bowling’s highlights will include, but are not limited to:
- Eating warm lettuce
- Watching Game 5 of the Tigers-Yankees ALDS through the silhouette of a hob-goblin (though someone told me the game was moved to Friday, but that’s possibly only because they don’t want me to watch because I’m a Tigers jinx)
- Watching Bowler #4 bowl with a sturdy back. This time of year, no issues for Bowler #4. In about 3 months, it gets painful to witness all of the stretching, arching, aching, and pure torture he goes through to get through another season.
- Meeting the “New Guy”. I am certain things will be very awkward for the first 4 frames, but by the 5th, we will all be whistling, drawing pictures, and spinning quarters.
- Knowing that even though Joe & Barb are not slotted to bowl tonight, they will show up, for the whistling, drawing, and quarter spinning.
- Not knowing what place we are in – hopeful that we are in first, frightful that no recaps have been posted, which could mean another year of cellar dwellers.
- Talking with Paul about the benefits of polishing the ole bowling ball, removing the old oils with Windex, and never actually doing any sort of maintenance, but pretending that it will happen.
- Bowling the first 200 game of the season, and celebrating with the ceremonial run to the other side of the alley, and high fiving the “men” until you get sucker punched in the gut
Things I Love: September Birthdays
If you’d have told me 10 years ago that I’d have two kids both born in the month of September, I very likely would’ve punched you square in the face and un-Friended you on Facebook (if Facebook had existed). I’m serious. But here I am, ten years later, and I’ve had to change my whole world view because that’s exactly what happened …two of my kids were born in September.
I have never been a fan of September born people, but I love my two little Septemberians (I’m assuming that’s what you call folks born in September). And the good news about having two of your children with birthdays so close together, you get to throw a combined party and get all that gathering of family out of the way in one shot.
One of the traditional songs my family sings at birthday parties is “Happy Birthday” and while of I have fond memories of my mother and my aunts taking the high notes while Uncles sang bass, and grandma beat-boxed (we would’ve dominated as a family a capella act on The Sing-Off, btw …recaps of my favorite show at spunkybean), it’s entirely possible we sounded more like we do in the videos below.
I know at least one person who hopes the new “screaming” v. “singing” doesn’t catch on. And I’m sure the “screaming” was a one-time thing, right? Cuz I know kids …they hate screaming and laughing.
Hard to believe my youngest is 5. Enjoy this little-known birthday song and let me know if you need to know where to send gifts.
Things I Do: Ghost Write
Is ghost-writing 1-word or two? Either way, in addition to the blogging I do, I also ghost-write. I ghost-write for two celebrity/gurus and just this week, I penciled a deal (which hopefully will be re-written in ink, soon) to author a memoir for a pretty awesome guy who works in my industry.
Turns out this is not uncommon. There are many successful men and women who are really great at being successful at what they do, and all of them would like to write a book they can brag about, but despite all their success, writing is totally intimidating.
Or, some of them just plain can’t do it.
I can. Meaning, I can write.
I was halfway through a sales book with a friend (and I kinda dropped the ball), but now I’ve got a real deal with a real timeline and the subject of the book could make for a really interesting project.
Have you ever read Tuesdays with Morrie? Me neither, but lots of people did. As I understand it, Mitch Album had a favorite professor from his college days and years later, Mitch, then a successful newspaper columnist, got back in touch with his old professor and wrote a book about him. And that book was a mega success and inspirational.
It is my hope this book can be something like that.
I have a stack of speeches, essays, newspaper and magazine articles, letters, stories, and quotes that I’m supposed to turn into a book. Fun.
Just promise me you’ll buy a copy when I finish. OK? OK.
Things I Do: Coach Soccer
The fall season is underway and my 3rd Grade girls team is 1-1 while my 1st Grade boys team is 0-2 (including a 9-0 drubbing this past weekend). Score shouldn’t matter. It’s a recreational youth league. Right? The primary goal is for all the kids to have some fun, run around and get some exercise, and if along the way some kid falls in love with soccer and becomes a soccer star, so be it. Truly …that’s the goal. It’s my goal. Team are comprised of any kid who wants to play. Any kid, at any age and of any skill level can sign up and play, and I’m glad there’s a rec league that caters to that.
My goal, in fact, is that my kids enjoy practice as much, if not more, than games.
However …it’s human nature. We all keep score. It was true for my Kindergartener’s tee-ball in the summer, and it’s the same for soccer. When a team loses, and especially 9-0, it doesn’t go unnoticed …by anyone. Luckily, I’ve never seen 6-year-olds play soccer like the team we played this past Saturday, and even the opposing coach shrugged his shoulders after the game when I complimented his team and a few of his players and he said, “I know …I’ve never seen anything like it …these boys could beat my 4th Grade daughter’s team.” You should’ve seen these 6-year-olds. Passing …spacing …relentless attacking and they had moves. This one kid did a spin move and a step-over!!!
I’m mostly concerned with trying to teach my boys which direction to run, and this kid’s doing step-over spin moves.
Needless to say, this is still going to be a super fun season for my 1st graders.
My third grade girls won Sunday, and I’m really glad for them. Once again, this is a rec league so score and wins/losses aren’t the main focus, and that’s never my focus …but I have a group of girls that work so hard, it’s nice to see their efforts rewarded. Also, as the guy who raised his hand and said, “I can coach. Soccer is my sport. I played it my whole life. I love soccer. Soccer is da bomb” …as the guy who said that (I may or may not have said “soccer is da bomb”) it’s also nice to see them have success and get a win because it validates my coaching …just a touch …and rewards their hard work (we practiced for an hour in the pouring rain last Wednesday and not a single girl complained).
Turns out, and the season will tell me if this is true or not, that I never taught the girls to score. When I played soccer, I played defense. I have a knack for bothering people, so it was a perfect spot for me. And, I lacked that little part of the brain that makes great scorers. I think some of it is instinctive. There are just some people who, when they hear the word “go”, they charge like a bull …screaming and yelling and throwing caution to the wind. These people are the goal scorers. Then there are people who, when they hear the word “go”, start a little slower. They want to think things through. And I think these people make great defenders. On defense, there’s quite a bit of observation that takes place. Analysis of the opposition. Defenders react to situations and learn what all the situations look like. Defenders thrive on some structure and systems. Forwards embrace the mayhem. Forwards and goal scorers only need to know one thing …”What is the end result I want? Ball inside that net? OK. ROOOOOOAAAAAR!” And off they go, with reckless abandon, and those goal scorers are of the mindset, hey, they’ll just adjust on the fly and eventually it will all work out.
What I’m saying is …I’m over analyzing this (defender). What I’m also saying is, I now have a theory that I’ll use to teach the girls scoring and show them how to get into better scoring positions and hopefully I’ll identify those goal-scorer types that thrive on chaos, and teach them how to best manage chaos and, hence, score goals.
And then I’ll write a best-seller business and sales book based on these theories.
This was all a long way of saying that I love soccer, I love coaching soccer, and the season has “kicked off.” Ha! Puns. Love them.
Thanks for reading and if you need me, I’ll be revolutionizing the soccer world.
Lung Stuff: I Have Bronchiectasis
I have a lung disorder ..and you-oooo, don’t. Yup …lucky me, I had a really, really bad cough back in 2007 and because I assumed I was still Superman, I just tried to cough my way through it and treat it with bottle after bottle of Robitussin. Turns out, it was a massive bacterial infection and, voila, two-week-long hospital stays later, here I am. Living with Bronchiectasis. For long periods of time between “incidences” I have no issues. I run. I bike. I yell and laugh heartily (can you really “yell heartily?”).
At times, I forget I even have Bronchiectasis. But then, out of the blue, at the most random of times, it hits me. I cough and it’s phlegmy. And sometimes I taste blood. And sometimes I see blood …like last night. There I am, minding my own business during Curriculum Night / Meet-the-Teacher Night at my kids’s school and I’m talking about Michigan State football and then I cough …and then my chest gurgles, and I cough some more (like, rather violently) and voila! … I’m coughing up blood. Just a tiny amount, mind you. I would say the equivalent of a 1/4 teaspoon.
This should not alarm me, according to my doctor. People with Bronchiectasis experience this from time to time. Or do they? I don’t know.
You might think this isn’t a very good blog entry for this blog (and my wife would agree with you), but I have an ulterior motive – I want people Google’ing “bronchiectasis” to find this and chat with me.
First, I’m not entirely convinced I have Bronchiectasis. But if I do, is this coughing-up-blood party trick common? Should I be taking a breathing treatment? Are their exercise enthusiasts who live with this condition and still run triathlons and marathons? Is Bronchiectasis, as my doctor says, simply an annoyance but not life-threatening? Or is my life expectancy diminished because when I hit my 60s I’m almost guaranteed to get pneumonia one day and then …curtains?
Or maybe I don’t have Bronchiectasis and some doctor online will give me a second opinion and questions to ask my Pulmonologist?
“But, Don,” you ask, “what is Bronchiectasis?” Here’s a pretty good explanation I found in a 2004 chat room. Most of the chat rooms/discussion threads I found were from 2008 or earlier. I want to start some new conversations.
Here is some information about bronchiectasis that I hope you find helpful. Inflammation causes damage to the airways of the lungs. When the airways become dilated this is called bronchiolectasis. When the airways become distorted with areas where mucus can collect this is called bronchiectasis. It can be difficult to clear this mucus because of damage to the normal methods that the lungs use to clear mucus. This can lead to episodes of infection. Traditionally an ongoing infection can lead to the inflammation. So it is important that lung infections are treated. Pulmonary hygiene is very important in preventing and controlling lung infections. Using an inhaled bronchodilator may help to loosen the mucus. Many people find the routine use of a mucus clearance device to be very helpful in clearing the mucus from their lungs. This is a small device that you exhale into causing a vibration in your lungs that loosen mucus so that you can cough it up easier. The names of 2 types of devices are Flutter Valve and Acapella. Bronchiectasis can result from airway blockage along with infection, so it may effect only one area of your lung. If your recurrent lung infections are always in the same area of the lung, surgery to remove that portion of your lung may provide a cure.
It seems to happen after I pig-out. Is that normal? I mean, when I have big, rich meals (like a big steak, or like a second helping of cake & ice cream) I get the cough. 
When I drink red wine it seems to flare up. Do any other Bronchiectasis sufferers notice a similar correlation? If eating fewer calories and never drinking eliminates most of my symptoms, I’m very cool with that. But if those aren’t triggers for anyone else, I’ll do some more asking.
Oh, and now that it’s turning to autumn in Michigan and temperatures are dropping and there’s cool/damp air, could that be something?
Thanks for reading. Chime in. Offer advice, opinions, encouragement, or simply point and laugh. My next blog entry will be silliness, I swear.
Oh, and here’s some links to some articles mainly because I want trackbacks and get Bronchiectasis hobbyists involved in this dialogue.
UPDATE (9/16/2011): Thanks to my sister and her superior web-search skills, she found a GREAT ARTICLE and a SUPPORT GROUP.
I might also have “Popcorn Lung.” Yes, that’s a real thing. I pop popcorn 2, 3, or 4+ times a week. I use an air-popper (could there be a better way to put popcorn seed particles and dust into the air?). All my flare ups recently have occurred when I drank red wine AND at popcorn. At Disney World, I ate popcorn almost every day (it smells sooooooo good) and what my kids didn’t finish, I’d eat theirs, too. In an August flair-up, I had multiple bowls of popcorn at a fance restaurant before having a glass (or three) of red wine. Yesterday, someone in my office horribly burnt a bag of popcorn in our breakroom (and it made me cough) and I then went out and had two glasses or red wine.
Stay tuned for more breaking news!
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001199/
[THIS IS THE BEST ARTICLE: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/950379/a_lung_disease_called_bronchiectasis.html?cat=5]
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Respiratory-Disorders/Flying-with-Bronchiactisis/show/283391
http://forums.webmd.com/3/heart-disease-exchange/forum/295
http://www.keywordspy.com/organic/keyword.aspx?q=bronchiactisis
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071202224457AAgASCL
Things I Make: Mix Tapes
Making a mix tape is a lost art.
I still make mix tapes.
Actually, I make “playlists” on my mp3 player nowadays, but same difference.
Recently I read a really good blog post by @ChristyTV where she discussed how music was way better back in the day. It’s worth reading.
It’s a topic I think about quite a bit. Music mattered to me for years and years and most songs and CDs are tied to some sort of memory or milestone. Then I graduated college and it seems like music stopped. Some of my college friends will tell you, indeed, music did stop right about the mid-90s and everything since is over-produced, commercialized crap.
That’s what old curmudgeons tend to say.
But I’m still makin’ mix tapes, and I have lots of music that’s tied to major milestones, and I suspect you do, too …you just might not realize it. No, I’m not makin’ mix tapes for girls I’m hoping to impress, carefully choosing a playlist that includes songs with lyrics that tell a story and simultaneously prove how cool and hip and intellectual I am. Instead, I’m makin’ mix tapes for girls who ride in car seats in the back of my SUV I can’t afford, and the mini-van I never dreamed I’d own (lease). I make mix tapes (playlists) for my kids and their friends whom I drive to school every morning. I carefully monitor Radio Disney, Top-40 stations, Disney Channel, and So Random! for the perfect blend of lyrically appropriate hits that keep my kids on the cutting edge of Top-40 shlock, but without crossing the line lyrically into a place where I’ll have to explain what certain things mean.
Like, as catchy as the song “Moves Like Jagger” is, I don’t want my 5, 7, and 8-year old singing these lyrics.
“Take me by the tongue
And I’ll know you;
Kiss me till you’re drunk
And I’ll show you.”
I’m just sayin’ …if you are in your 30s, chances are you think all music sucks. There’s a never-ending cycle of musical phases and the older generation is genetically coded to hate all music that didn’t happen during their own puberty. And chances are you romantically hold dear certain songs that are tied to certain eras and moments in your life, but don’t live in the past. Open your ears and listen to the music around you and realize this horrible modern music is the music that you’ll dance to at this year’s Daddy Daughter Dance, that your kids will ask you to turn up when it comes on the radio, and someday when we’re all empty-nesters in our 50s and 60s and we somehow hear a song from Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, Hot Chale Rae, and the “High School Musical” soundtracks, we’re going to have to wipe some tears from our eyes and we’ll wish they still made music like that.
Listen to some bad, awful music today. Dance with your kids. Press ‘play’ below and turn it up …tonight (tonight).
Things I Did: Sold Salsa at a Farmers Market
I can’t believe it’s already Wednesday and I’m five days removed from my first ever salsa sales event at a farmers market in Michigan. Although just about everything was going against me having any sort of success, mostly the weather pretty much shutting down the farmers market, I still managed to sell salsa to just about everyone who tried it.
For me …wow. Random strangers trying some of my salsa and my salsa recipe and loving it. Loving …it!
Then, with almost a third of my salsa unsold, thanks to the power of Facebook (and a little big Twitter), I sold out the rest of my salsa by Tuesday and have some future orders waiting for my next batch.
What now? To follow the Donnie Jalapeno saga, make sure you bookmark Donnie Jalapeno Salsa, ‘Like’ Donnie Jalapeno on Facebook, and follow @DonnieJalapeno on Twitter.
So, I’m now a salsa magnate, and I’m also dropping my kids off at school again every morning. Seeing my little tikes in their crisp Catholic school uniforms dutifully heading into school after giving me a hug/kiss goodbye – that’s the best part of my day, every day.
I like fall and back-to-school. There’s something extremely comforting and soothing about strict routine. 7pm – wake the kids. 7:10 – make coffee, unload dishwasher, have breakfast. 7:30 – brush teeth, hair, pack backpacks/briefcase. 7:40 – leave for school.
Despite the routine, the routine always manages to be hectic and crazy, but still …it’s a routine and I function better with routine.
Time to make the salsa. Thanks for reading.
Don Kowalewski 