Official Announcement: I’m Done with the Rivalry

There’s that age-old question about a dog chasing a cat and what happens if the cat doesn’t run away? But what about this… what if the dog doesn’t chase the cat? Think about it. The cat loves teasing the dog and knows the dog will never catch it. But a dog will always chase a cat. It’s what a dog does. 

Until it doesn’t. 

And after the latest scandal and investigation involving the University of Michigan football team, consider me a dog that just doesn’t feel like chasing a cat anymore.

I’m done with the Michigan State v. University of Michigan rivalry. Honestly. I suddenly don’t care. I’ll sit over here a chew my bone. I’ll chase squirrels. And birds. I’ll play fetch. There’s lots of fun things to do without having to worry about those annoying pussies … er, I mean … cats.

A rivalry works when one side wants what the other has. Or when there’s hatred. In the case of Michigan v. Michigan State, well, Michigan was there first. They racked up lots and lots of football victories. Then along came Michigan State College which became a University and wanted to play in the Big Ten and Michigan wanted to keep Michigan State out of the Big Ten. Stuff like that helped start the rivalry. Plus, it’s in-state and for a long time, Michigan was elite academically and not everyone could get into Michigan, and so they went to Michigan State. There was a sorta less-than feeling among Michiganders who went to State, Central, Western, or Eastern. Kinda this idea that, oh, everyone if given the choice would obviously want to go to Michigan if they could … but nanner, nanner, nanner … you can’t go here. Hence the “can’t read! can’t write” chant that would echo when Spartans started cheering “go green, go white.”

Admittedly, it was kinda clever and fun and maybe there was some truth to it.

Now? It’s just not true, anymore. The world is flat. College is college and Universities are Universities and Michigan State has nothing to live up to and has millionaires and billionaires and has academic programs that are unrivaled anywhere regardless of the University. 

I got into Michigan. I chose Michigan State. I love Michigan State. My wife went to Michigan State. My kids go there. My brother, sister, and brothers-in-law and nephews go there. Given the choice, I’d choose MSU again and again and again. 

What’s more, the rivarly is toxic. Probably some comes from the Spartans in there direction, but too often it comes from their “fans” (who are much different than their Alums) and it’s become mean and nasty. I don’t have enough years, months, weeks, hours and minutes left breathing oxygen to waste any of it arguing with Michigan-fan. 

And lastly, rivalries are sometimes based on one side having something the other side wants which, in this rivalry was years and years of winning, championships, and tradition. I’ll give them that. They do. But that’s way, way, way in the past and for about the last 20 years, it’s felt pretty even and, then, the success they had recently was suspect because of cheating. They protected star players and hid things. And one of their legendary heroes may have also been involved in a cover-up so …now? Honestly, I just kinda don’t think of them as arrogant and righteous and as some sort of “ideal” that I would even want. 

In fact, when the recent ruling came down and Michigan had to pay $30-Million dollars in fines, they had to suspend their coach, and their old coach (Harbaugh) and accomplice (Connor Stallians) were given 10 and 8 year “show cause” … you’d think there’d be a moment of “tail between the legs” and instead, a Michigan fan I know texted in a group chat some cheap shots about MSU’s old coach and some other random Ohio State dig. I thought, what is this? And the better question … why is this?

Well, as of today … it isn’t. For me, at least.

Officially, I don’t care anymore. It used to be Spartans would say, “if we go 1-10 and our only win is against Michigan, it’s a good season.” Nope. Not anymore. I think if we go 10-1 or 11-1 and our only loss is against Michigan … whatever. We’d still be in the playoffs. 

Michigan State has itself to worry about. That’s it. And if we’re looking at other schools and programs as a measuring stick for what “success” looks like, Michigan isn’t on a list of schools I aspire to or want. 

Rivalries are fun …until they aren’t. Until they’re dumb and mean and toxic and when one side of the rivarly is incapable of humility or accepting defeat or saying, “good effort …we’ll get you next time.”

Again … Spartans aren’t innocent in the toxicity, but from this moment forward, I won’t be part of the toxicity. Lots of ugliness in the world and when sports and a rivalry aren’t “fun” and “good spirited” … see above … I don’t have enough breaths left in my lungs to waste another breath talking about the rivalry or their school or making jokes and arguing.

It was fun at one point. Now. It’s not. 

I’m a Spartan and I’m officially declaring the rivalry …over.